This post comes from Sola
1. The illness I live with is: Migraines, PTSD, Depression, Alcoholism, Fibromyalgia, Sleep Apnea, Graves Disease, Hypothyroidism
2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: Migraines: 1994, Alcoholism PTSD and Depression: 2004, Fibromyalgia and Sleep Apnea: 2007, Graves Disease and Hypothyroidism: 2010
3. But I had symptoms since: as long as I can remember.
4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: Learning to ask for help, accepting that I can't be totally self-sufficient, and lowering my expectations for what I can do in a day.
5. Most people assume: I'm young and healthy
6. The hardest part about mornings are: Getting out of bed when I'm in pain and my body doesn't want to move
7. My favorite medical TV show is: Grey's Anatomy
8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: Pill Sorter
9. The hardest part about nights are: Being alone with memories of my abuse and convincing myself to go to bed when that's where I was hurt.
10. Each day I take __ pills & vitamins. (No comments, please) 22-32
11. Regarding alternative treatments I: get massage, see a chiropractor and meditate. I think it's frustrating that insurance doesn't pay for the things that help me the most.
12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: Visible
13. Regarding working and career: I haven't been able to work in 18 months. I miss my job, having somewhere to go every day where I felt useful and could help people. I'm in school, but I don't know if I will ever be able to work again. I hate it when people ask me how my job is going because I feel so ashamed that I am not able to work.
14. People would be surprised to know: I dream of hiking and rafting the Grand Canyon some day, but don't know if I will ever be able to.
15. The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been: That I'm too sick to be able to hold down a job and show up every day.
16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: Learning to stand up for my needs with doctors. Getting over my fear of needles and talking about really intimate body functions.
17. The commercials about my illness: make it sound like I could just take a pill and make it all better. Don't exist for PTSD, migraines, Graves disease or hypothyroidism.
18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: Yoga, kayaking, hiking, swimming on a team,
19. It was really hard to have to give up: my job
20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: Knitting
21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: Go White Water Rafting
22. My illness has taught me: To appreciate every day and the little things. Not to take anything for granted
23. Want to know a secret? One thing people say that gets under my skin is: That people on public assistance are lazy
24. But I love it when people: Listen. Sit with me when I cry. Give me hugs. Acknowledge how much I have been through. Tell me I'm a strong survivor, brave or that they admire me.
25. My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is:
"Somebody told me that the darkest hour comes right before the dawn,
And I will find my way back to myself if I could just hold on,
Hold on,
To the light.
And it's going to be all right.
I know it's going to be all right.
Cuz love is on your side.
Don't fear your life.
Cuz it's going to be all right."
~"Dawn" by Gina Bredlove (it's a song)
26. When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them: Just live in today
27. Something that has surprised me about living with an illness is: that everything I go through makes me stronger
28. The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was: When my girlfriend tells me she loves me and wants to be in my life despite the fact that I'm not always able to do fun things.
29. I’m involved with Invisible Illness Week because: I want people to stop and think that every person you meet is going through something and doing the very best they can with what they have.
30. The fact that you read this list makes me feel: Hopeful that someone will work to make more resources available to struggling people.
I am a Christian. I am a wife. I am a daughter. I am a friend. I have babies in heaven. I take pictures. Love to write. I strive to show compassion.
Derek is also a Christian. He is a husband - to me. An amazing husband. He loves intensely. Laughs freely. He is strong. I am amazed when I consider that he chose ME. I love him. He loves me.
This is my Gramma. Eileen. Of everyone I have ever known, she is the one I desire to be like. She was wildly compassionate. Generous. A woman of integrity. Goofy. Cute. My hero. She is in Heaven.
Bayleigh is intense. She is small. She is beautiful. Sweet. Wild. Mischevious without limits. And she chirps.
Furbis is the epitome of catness. He is handsome. Big. Sweet. Dangerously intelligent. Strong. He breaks things. And talks.
Calliah is special. Furbis chose her. She is sweet. Not very smart. Funny. Pretty. Puts her toys in water. And the more she loves you, the harder she bites.
Izzy is super sweet. She's pretty. Passionate about playing. She licks things. She doesn't talk much. Snuggles a lot. And sleeps on my head.
1 comment:
I don't know you and I haven't read any of your other posts. Just enough to know that you have been through a lot and have emerged through it with a lot of baggage. I know how it feels when people say they understand, but they really can't. Because they aren't there in the mornings when it's the toughest. Because nothing, absolutely nothing can make anyone understand the pain of losing a child. I'm 19 years old and have PTSD, GAD, Fibromyalgia and sleep disorders. So I do know how it feels. A fraction of it at least. As I go through days I find out more and more number of things wrong with my body and I can't help but feel trapped. My religion is not the same as yours. I didn't set my eyes on your posts till now.. but I can say only one thing. I will pray to the God I believe in, that he make you strong enough to face what you are going through.
You aren't alone and you may have probably heard it a lot of times already, but this is coming from someone in the same boat. Pain does make one stronger, but life seems unfair sometimes. May God bless you, your spouse, your gran and your children in heaven. I'm sure that they are angels God couldn't have sent to earth for their beauty of heart. Lots of love,
being a stranger.
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