Sunday, June 20, 2010

My Baby's Daddy.

Today is Father's Day.  The day set aside to honor every father in this country.  The day for maple syrup kisses and bear hugs, backwards letters and stick figures.  The day when I wish everyone could see my baby's daddy as that - a daddy.

But they don't see.  They don't know that his heart is hurting today.  He doesn't have a visible mark, doesn't get to hang pictures in his workspace, and has never had the joy of a tiny voice saying "I love you, daddy."  And yet, in spite of that... he is a daddy.  He has missed most of the "good parts" pertaining to fatherhood, but has known goodbye.  He's known "not enough time" and has thought to himself "no fair."  He is my baby's daddy.

I don't know exactly what is in his heart today... I only know what is in mine.  And I know what he has said... that he wishes he could have known her.  That she should be greeting him when he walks in the door after work.  That he cries when he knows I can't see.  That it hurts.

And I know that, regardless of what the "world" sees and knows... regardless of what tomorrow holds... he is, and will always be, my baby's daddy.

Happy Father's day, Derek.

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