Thursday, September 16, 2010

May God Reign

Israel... beautiful, amazing baby boy.  You came into this world the day before our anniversary.  I remember sitting in the waiting room, wishing the rest of your family would hurry up and see you and leave - I couldn't wait to meet you.

You were everything I had expected you to be - and yet nothing I expected could have been as amazing as you.  I expected you to be wonderfully, beautifully made - and you are.  I expected you to be strong - and you are.  I expected the new-baby smell, the tiny fists, the dark blue eyes.  I even expected you to steal a big part of my heart.

But I didn't expect you to look SO much like your daddy... and at the same time, make exactly the same faces your mom makes.  I didn't expect you to capture my attention so fully.  I didn't expect to lay awake half the night, smiling at the memory of the time I got to spend with you in my arms.  I didn't expect to love you so much it hurts (in a good way). 

I expected your daddy to love you, to be proud of you, to be protective.  But I never could have imagined the look he has on his face when he looks at you.  I haven't ever seen him like this.  He thinks you are the most amazing creation in the world, I think.  He talks about you, a lot.  He takes pictures, and shows them to us.  He will be there for you for the rest of his life, Israel.  He loves you with the intensity and passion of your God.  He would lay down his life for you - of that, I have no doubt.

I expected your mommy to love you, too.  I expected her to be happy, to be relieved, to be proud.  And she is all of those things.  But Israel, if I could freeze her face, her voice, her eyes for you, I would.  Then, when you are older and it's harder to see things like a mother's love, you would have a reminder.  She holds you tight and close, like you are the most precious thing ever to exist... and she stares at you with a look of pure love, amazement, and joy.  Sweet child, you have made her happier than I have ever seen her. 

I also expected that your mommy and daddy would let Tio and I hold you... and love you... eventually.  I didn't expect the trust, the love, the way they let me feel your heart beating against my chest and breathe in your new baby smell.  Well, I did expect those things.  But I didn't expect to have the honor of doing it so much. 

I didn't expect that you would melt my heart the way you do.  I expected to feel this way when I have children of my own... but for you?  It wasn't something I thought could happen, and yet it has.  I would give everything I have, including my life, for you.

Tio got to really hold you yesterday, got to stare into your eyes and listen to your noises.  And it's happened to him, too.  As much as your parents want us to, and as much as we can, we want you to be part of our lives.  Your in our hearts, our prayers... on our minds.

We love you.

Your name, Israel, means "May God Reign."  And I pray that He does in your life, always.  Your mom and dad will raise you to love and serve Him.  Listen to them closely... and follow Him with all of your strength.  When you lay down at night, remember that He is with you, He keeps you safe and gives you peace.  When you're facing giants, remember that you do not stand alone.  If you will let Him, He will win those battles for you.  I pray that your faith would be strong, unwavering... child-like even when you grow old.  Search His Word every day, sweet boy.  It will help you to become the man you were created to be.  It will answer your hardest questions, comfort you when your heart is broken, and it will give you hope when all around seems wrong.  Let Him reign in you, Israel.  Honor your mom and your dad.  While you are still a child, obey them - not because they are right, but because obedience is right.  They are Godly people - our brother, our sister - and they will do everything they can to teach you the important things in life.

And so will we.  To whatever extent possible, in whatever ways we can, and regardless of the cost, we will support them as they raise you.  We will pray.  We will love.  We will laugh and cry with you, with them. 

And of course, we will probably take thousands of pictures of you.  Before you even turn one.  If your parents to make us start leaving our cameras in the car. 

Today, you are three weeks old.  I am not sure how that happened so quickly.  Yesterday, I drove you and your mom to the airport so you could say goodbye to Abuela.  She doesn't cry, Israel.  At least not when she's getting on a plane to go home to Rodrigo and Abuelo.  But when she held you, and they announced that it was time for people on her flight to be processed through security... she cried.  Big, shining tears.  She looked so torn, so heartbroken, that it made me almost cry. 

All of that, to say this:
Let God reign in your life.  Honor and obey your mom and dad.  Never stray from the Word of God.  I pray you come to a saving relationship with Christ early in your life, and never walk away from it.  And while you're here... you are loved.  You are cherished.  You are amazingly, wonderfully, beautifully made.  You are wanted.  You are safe and sound.

And I for one count it an unspeakable honor to be granted the title of Tia.  And I love you, Israel James.  Happy 3 week birthday.

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1 comment:

marijoy_0110 said...

This is so beautifully worded, Jenna!!!... and really captures some of the thoughts in my heart too! Even though I am Israel's auntie by blood, I never thought I would feel a love quite as strong for him, and am quite surprised by it. I am overwhelmed by how much I am allowed to hold him and love on him!
The pictures you took of him are just beautiful!
He is a special boy with a special calling on his life!