NICIAW - Depression, PTSD, Arthritis, Ligament Damage

Ruth writes:

1. The illness I live with is: Depression, PTSD, arthritis and serious ankle ligament damage/foot bone spur from an old injury.

2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: 1995 onward's, various things diagnosed over the years. Injury happened in 1990, or 1991, can't quite remember.

3. But I had symptoms since: With the depression, looking back I realize I've suffered for as long as I can remember.

4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: Not being able to hold down a job.

5. Most people assume: There is nothing wrong as none are immediately visible, although I use crutches a lot more these days.

6. The hardest part about mornings are: Getting up and getting motivated, especially if I'm in a lot of physical pain, it does have a knock on affect.

7. My favorite medical TV show is: n/a.

8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: My computer, linked to the internet, as they provides me with a way of connecting with people. Also, reading and music, so my Kindle and iPod.

9. The hardest part about nights are: Dealing with the insomnia, nightmares and pain control.

10. Each day I take __ pills & vitamins. (No comments, please) - Two types of anti depressants, pain killers, one of two types depending on the level of pain. Sometime I also require sleeping tablets.

11. Regarding alternative treatments I: Have found Reiki useful in helping me relax.

12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: visible!

13. Regarding working and career: I had to give up work back in 1995, and again in 2006. I really miss it, and wish I could do more.

14. People would be surprised to know: How much physical and emotional pain I am in every day as I have got used to hiding it very well.

15. The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been: Not being able to work.

16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: Have to courage to try and spread awareness by doing things like filling in this form.

17. The commercials about my illness: Can't say I've really seen any.

18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: Riding horses.

19. It was really hard to have to give up: Work and riding horses, and I had worked with animals professionally ..

20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: None.

21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: Treasure every moment.

22. My illness has taught me: To be patient with myself.

23. Want to know a secret? One thing people say that gets under my skin is: 'It doesn't look/seem that bad.' Or a Doctor that once said. 'It could have been worse.' ... I think the only thing that is worse than being subjected to child abuse would have been if they had killed me!

24. But I love it when people: Say something spontaneously that make me realize I'm not 'lazy' and that I am justified in feeling like I do. Especially when it comes from somebody I have a huge amount of respect for. Happened last year, and whenever I need to remind myself that I am allowed to feel like this I remember what they said. was a very affirming moment.

25. My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is: A quote from the After Silence store. 'You thought you'd destroy me, but you only made me stronger.'

26. When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them: It does get easier to live with what you are going through, it takes time, be kind to yourself in the meantime.

27. Something that has surprised me about living with an illness is: How much people can wrongly assume what you are capable of.

28. The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was: Provided me with a safe haven.

29. I’m involved with Invisible Illness Week because: It's time the barriers of ignorance were pulled down, and the only way to do that is to debunk the myths by speaking up about our experiences so people don't have the grounds to assume.

30. The fact that you read this list makes me feel: Hopeful that slowly people are recognizing that illness covers more than they perhaps realized before