Sunday, February 15, 2009


Do you remember who your first Valentine was? Mine was my Grampa, and I was so young I don't even remember it. You see, my Grampa has always loved me fiercly, sweetly, and consistently. He is a good man. Since my second Valentine's day (the first one I was only about 7 weeks old), he hasn't missed a single one. 14 days after he and Gramma were in the accident, and Gramma died, he STILL remembered. This year was no exception.

And I was sitting here just a moment ago, thinking about that. And I realized something... there will come a day when he's not here. It's not very likely that I'll step into eternity before he does. And chances are good I'll have a lot of Valentine's days to celebrate without him. That thought got to me a bit. Made me sad. And then I realized something... tonight, he's in his house alone. His Valentine is in heaven. And my heart aches for him.
If I look up right now, I can see my Valentine. My beloved. My husband. Watching my Grampa over the last two years has been hard, but God has used it to help me. To get me to look at this man I love, this man I married, and appreciate him more. Cherish him more. Worry less about "getting things done" and take a few extra minutes to just enjoy him. Sometimes, I watch him from across the room and my heart feels almost like it's breaking. Not because I'm sad or hurt, but because I'm so full of love. And appreciation. I know he's not perfect. I know there are things about him that could and even should change. But the gift of having him, of knowing him, is just that - a gift. A beautiful gift for which I am so very thankful.

I love you baby.

By the way, in honor of my beloved, I have changed the first song that plays. It's called "Book of Love." And we affectionately call it "our dumb song." I'll leave it up for the next week or so.

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